Butterfly Chaos

It took me months to made this.

I've had the idea in my head since last year, but it wasn't until two months a go that I finally had the courage to actually take a paper and draw it.

Yes, it's a very personal project, and when I started it I had suspected that I might not going to like what it becomes.

Which is quite true.

I showed it to a very dear friend of mine, and the first thing that she said to herself was (as she finally admit a few days later), why would anyone want to hurt themselves like this?

on the making, with the smeared part on the left,
 courtesy of my daughter

When I started drawing this, I wanted it to be sweet. And when working on it, I wanted to make the process calming for me, so I made the tangle with details, knowing that it works all the time in keeping me focus and on the ground.

But when my friend said it's painful, I know too, that she's right.

Then I realize that maybe that's just what it is. Even in something that is supposed to be sweet, I still have this nagging bitterness in me.